Finally, that confidence boost

I cannot believe that it has almost been a year since i wrote my last blog post. A lot has happened during this time, it has been quite eventful indeed...

Yesterday, i attended a family wedding, surrounded by loving family and friends, in which i had some interesting discussions with some very interesting people (along with lots of drinking, dancing and very bad singing), which led me to feeling extremely inspired again. I have also received multiple comments about how i should start blog writing again, and here i am.

So, let me fill you in about what has been happening...

First of all, i do not want to bore you, so i'll not go into every little detail. Here we go... I feel like i am at that age (24) where you learn some of the most important lessons in your life. This last year has been somewhat of a roller coaster. I have learnt a lot about myself and others. I have come to discover how much of a sensitive person i am, and although i don't like to admit it, i have sadly allowed people to criticise, degrade and intimidate me (not cool). I have also learnt that i do not take things with a pinch of salt, i take everything to heart and this has recently led me to lose a lot of self confidence.

However, only i can change this. So far, i have learnt to walk away from all the negativity and learnt to do what's best for me and actually do what makes me happy, and not others. I noticed i was feeling very uncomfortable around a lot of people because i was trying to be someone i wasn't... i constantly worry about what people think... This has to stop, it's exhausting.

I'm sharing this with you because i know i am not alone and i just want you to know that it's so important to be yourself, people should want to accept you for who you are. One of the worst feelings is feeling like you're misunderstood. You have to remember, people lead very different life's, we've all walked in different shoes. To try and understand what someone else is or going through, isn't easy and some people are not willing to to even try or  they think they know, but they just don't. But, nobody is perfect. Everyone has their weaknesses and everyone has their strengths. At the end of the day, we are all human but constantly trying to please everyone else is so unhealthy for you. Since i realised all of this and actually started doing something about it, like putting myself first for once, worrying less and just going with the flow, i literally feel like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders.

It is also important to know who to confide in, which is those who believe in you, who push you to do well (as daunting as that is sometimes). Like i said, it has been a roller coaster, the only thing that has kept me strong throughout my recent struggle, has been surrounding myself with amazing friends and family. I have been to three amazing weddings, three of the most fun hen party's, birthdays, festivals, etc, etc.... it has been a fantastic summer.

I have now got myself a new lovely job and i have also took it upon myself to go back to college to study GCSE English again. English has been one of my weak points,  however, im determined to do what i need to do in order to help myself with my future and my self confidence. So far it's going great and i am really enjoying it. There is still a long way to go, but i feel like i have come a long way and i know there are a lot of people out there who care and want to help me, which makes me very happy.

I might have taken a step back, but sometimes you have to take a step back to take 10 steps forward.

Onwards and Upwards!

Upwards and Onwards

It's been a while hasn't it? I'm incredibly sorry! I've been caught up on settling back into my final year at university - Finally! Yay! :-D

When it comes to myself and feelings at the moment, they've been here and there! October is a hard month for me but Do you ever just feel like, you aren't good enough? Well, I'm all one for positive thinking and everything but I'm not sure what happened this time, i just found myself getting lower and lower.

Firstly, I found myself feeling very low about  my ability to be a blog writer! Another reason was that i almost had (what could have been) a very serious car accident, which scared me so much! Which made me doubt my driving skills. If it's one piece of advice i have for you, do not take things or people for granted!!! It's safe to say, im slowly getting over it and taking a lot more caution! We've all done it right? Lesson learnt!! There is a few other reasons to why i felt the way i have been but I'll not bore you! :-)

OK so, after feeling down in the dumps, I woke up one morning and gave myself a reality check! I'd do this thing that my sister used to tell me to do, where you would write a list of 10-20 things you have to look forward to in your life as well as setting goals! I find it helps to motivate me. 

I find it amazing how much self confidence people can have. Some people think I'm quite confident and I do like to think I am most of the time. I mean, I can talk the hind legs off a donkey! But what people don't see is that I'm easily intimidated. I will try my best to fit in with anyone, sometimes I struggle but what you have to accept is, that's just the way it is sometimes! Some people are not as easy to get on with as much as others but if it's one thing i've learnt, it's to be yourself, don't try and be someone your not and most importantly, Believe in yourself. Because if you don't... you won't get far. Be positive! :-)

Today, I read this article in the Company Magazine - it was quite interesting actually! About, how it's getting to that time of year where everyone's making themselves available, ready to get all cosy for the Christmas/winter season! Isn't that crazy? I say this, but deep down im one of these people! Or at least, id like to be... but not just for the winter season!!! that's just pure madness if you ask me. This is where self confidence comes into it... when it comes to guys, im so shy! I am the biggest wimp and I hate admitting this, because guys like confident females don't they? Apparently. I just don't seem to handle the whole 'Butterfly' feeling very well and quite frankly, it always gets the better of me!  I don't know why and I like to think that I'm not the only one

If your anything like me, your a people pleaser and you worry too much what people think? Yes? Well, i should probably take my own advice in this case, but don't. 

These are the things I tell myself everyday! 

1) Don't worry about what people think of you. (What your wearing or what you are doing, being confident and being different makes you stand out from the crowd!)

2) Believe in yourself. (You can do it! Whatever it is you want to do, get up and do it!)

Which brings me to number 3..

3) There's no such thing as 'Can't' (Anything is possible!)

4) Set yourself goals and achievements (I did this on my year out and doubted myself but I kept going and did it, I achieved more than everything I hoped I would, and believe me... it's the best feeling in the world!)

5) All you can do is try your best (At least you can say you tried, even if it comes to not being very confident with something, you don't know until you try!)

6) It's not the end of the world (Never give up. I've been through some pretty bad times in the last few years... there was a point when i thought it was the end of the world and i gave up, but i soon realised there's a big world out there. Pick yourself up and try again. Maybe start a new journey?)

7) Always turn a negative into a positive (Positive thinking attracts positive people and happenings!)

8) Smile :-)

Dee 
xox


Images from : 
http://thekissingexpert.com/kiss-essentials/the-naughty-nice-of-mistletoe-kissing
http://www.123rf.com/stock-photo/specific.html
http://signature-strength.com/workshops/mastermind-your-career/attachment/fed-up-woman-at-desk-2/

You only live once

Lately, i'm trying to face the truth instead of lying to myself, whats the point in lying? It's doesn't make you  happy, even if  you do wish there was a side of you that felt differently but unfortunately, things change.

Anyway... Hello! It has been a while. This isn't one of my usual fashion - hair  inspiring blogs but it is about one of those moments when you  just stop and take a step back, and everything hits you. I love that feeling, it makes me feel alive, like i know what i want and i know what i need to do. I know what i want in life, I graduate next year and i'm hoping to either land in a really good job within Fashion, or go abroad travelling, you only live once, i'm still young, and i have my whole life ahead of me, so why not? 

I tend to have these moments when I've had one of those fed-up sort of days, i always try and snap out of it by thinking about the positive things in life! I had one of these days today, in which i found myself craving chocolate and because i couldn't go buy any (as i'm saving my money because I'M GOING TO BARCELONA! More about that later) Luckily, i found brownie mix in my cupboard - Yay! Its safe to say my horrible day turned into  a lovely evening with two of my girls. We decided we would all spend the evening together, eating crap and watching films! As girls do! :-) We watched Sisterhood of the traveling pants 1 & 2! (How fit is Kostos!?) It's made me really want to go to abroad, which i will be soon because im going to Barcelona! Not quite the same as Greece i know, but it's still going to be a nice break away from everything going on here... Like, I always think to myself, how good would it be if i could just run away from all the problems? Well, we know that isn't the answer so i just tell myself to have a nap instead and get over it, this is why my friends probably find me asleep most of the time! :-P  Life's a bitch though right? we all have to deal with bad moments from time to time. 

So yeah, i'm going to Barcelona in 2 weeks and 3 days! I'm so stupidly excited. We're going to see a lot of Gaudi, his work is just amazing and so inspiring, along with Salvador Dali - Can't wait!!! 

Anyway, Tomorrow i'll be doing some more fashion inspiration's for you's! My sister's getting married next year, and i need to find a style for my dress! - Excited! 

Peace Out.

Dee.

xoxox

My Story...

I've always been a vain creature! I don't know why, because on most days i look in the mirror and i think 'sweet  Jesus' -  i suppose we all think that though, right? While other's... they might think you look great!  Don't get me wrong, we all have our good and bad days!

I've always been told that i'm very photogenic! Ever since i was young, I've helped my sister and other  friends with their projects by modelling! I've always helped out when it's come to stuff like that. I've helped out at the College fashion shows by agreeing to do some catwalk modelling... next to professional models too! I have to admit, the pressure was unreal. I can't imagine what it's like at a real professional  fashion show!!

 

 This is me modelling for my collection - Punk and Disorderly!

Bits and bobs from walking the catwalk!

 

Being a model, was what i always wanted to be when i was growing up! My mum bought me and my sister one of those photo-shoot  packages! I LOVE IT! I feel very vain saying this, but the photographers said i had the face for it!

 

 Since then, i was sure that's what i wanted to do, my mum supported me all the way! I got accepted by a modelling agency... i received a letter  through the post with details and got very excited until i saw that we had to pay so much to build a portfolio! But mum was willing to pay! she wanted this more than me i think! My cousin, being a professional model, said i shouldn't pay any agency! After this,  i didn't know what to do. I eventually got really busy with college and work, that i gave up!

Unfortunately, i lost my mum just over a year ago, My aunt (Mums sister & my cousins mum) is always saying i should get into commercial modelling... and i know my mum always wanted me too because deep now she knew i did too! My dad never shuts up about it either!

My Cousin is a big inspiration to me!  She does all sorts of modelling! she's out there and  She's amazing!

People say, if you want something, you can do it! You just have to go the right way about it and think positive!

But I'm not sure where to start!

If you think you can help me or give me any advice, please get in touch!

darylivyana@outlook.com